Parenting & Attachment Online Group

 Not feeling like a “good enough parent?”

PARENTING & ATTACHMENT Group

• Do you know that a lot of those feelings and your capacity to strive as a parent are determined by your attachment style?
• Feeling tired, overwhelmed, confused, like you don’t understand yourself or your children?
• Tired of reading books and practicing techniques that sometimes work and sometimes don’t?
• Still confused about what type of parent you want to be? Too strict, too flexible, and can’t figure things out?
• Do you know that the most efficient way to be a good parent is by working on yourself? Yes, we can predict our children’s secure attachment (meaning happier and more meaningful future) with 85% accuracy by working on our own attachment style?

We know that the first months when a baby comes are hard and a big adjustment.

But what happens after those first months and years pass?

Do you feel that things are better now? That your expectations about the child and yourself were met? The journey to figure out your role as a parent, your interactions, and type of parent you want to be isn’t easy. The surprise is that most of all of that is driven by unconscious dynamics: mostly our own attachment.

Improve Relationship with children and with ourselves

So by exploring and understanding our own style we could improve and have a satisfactory relationship with our children and with ourselves. No more guilt, confusion and everyday questioning. It is exhausting! Now we can predict a good future for our children and that of our relationship with them with 85% accuracy by working on our attachment style. After all it is true. All we can control is us!

In this group we won’t be focusing mainly on the children and behavioral techniques but on ourselves and our internal processes, reactions and pasts to see how they influence the present and therefore, improve them. Based on Dr. Daniel Siegel’s work (Mindsight, Interpersonal Neurobiology and Parenting from the Inside Out).

WHO:

Mothers, fathers, parents to be, teachers and educators of all ages. Because the attachment style is flexible you can influence your children’s attachment and yours anytime.

To find out more if this group is for you, please watch this complimentary video:

DATE & TIME: TBD

DURATION: 90 minutes

COST: $45 or less  per session payable by Paypal in advance.

Get 10% off if you sign up by March 15th. Recommended option.
Get 15% off by mentioning the name of the group you heard about us from.

Reserve your spot today!

To request for information or to register please call 703-231-7991 or email to isabelkirk@gmail.com

My Story:

I don’t know you but for me the transition to motherhood was the most challenging thing I have done in my life. Didn’t have a clue but thought I would figure it out on the way as everybody else does. However, with the time passing instead of feeling better I became more confused, more doubtful and more unhappy with my own role. The feelings and interactions felt exhausting and the lack of answers daunting. That is when I decided to do something about it and research my way through.

I read tons of parenting books that have been helpful, no doubt but wouldn’t change my core feelings and wouldn’t provide enough understanding for me to feel ok. Well I had been a therapist for a while and had always been interested in attachment.

I found what I needed

But wasn’t until I came across Daniel Siegal’s work, Alan Schore, Tina Payne Bryson and other attachment experts that I found what I needed, so I decided to specialize in attachment. And this is why and how I developed the concepts for this group. Now we have the information and tools for us and our kids to have better life, why not do it?

I am a therapist and not by coincidence. Like most people, I had an ok childhood and was raised by parents that love me. However, they had their own unresolved stories and insecure attachment styles.  Through my own work I realized my mother had anxious style and my father avoidant. Not surprisingly since it is the most common combination among couples. I developed mostly an anxious as well but inherited some avoidant traits from my father. Why do I tell you all of this?

Because finding out how all of that plays in my role as a mother and as a partner changed my life. Gave meaning and awareness to my reactions to my children, to why some moments were more difficult than others, and with some guidance and healing started to guide me towards a resolution and more conscious reactions which improved my relationship with my kids and myself almost immediately. So that is what I am offering to you.

Mission:

I truly believe we are in the Golden Age of Parenting. You and I are in the middle of a renaissance of advances that will continue to impact humanity and our children need us more than ever.

The intersection of developmental psychology, attachment, neuroscience, mindfulness and so many other fields of research continue to redefine what it means to be a parent.

Today we thankfully count with many resources to better understand ourselves and the people we love with. I can see also how this can be overwhelming so the best is to look around and decide what works best for you. That is why here I am outlining my approach and what it offers.

For me, I love to continue to learn and grow. This journey of being a human, a parent, a therapist…helping others and also doing my own work continues to get richer and richer. But  sometimes like anybody else I felt isolated and burnout.  It was only when I realized that when we come together to support each other can change the game and make it more rewarding for everybody. I like to surround my self with people that feels the same way, are motivated and share those goals. So here we go!

What you will get:

• Awareness and healing of your own attachment style so you can break the patterns and live in a securely attached family.
• Easier transition to your role as a parent no matter how long you have been one.
• More understanding and compassion towards your own reactions and feelings.
• Interactions improvement and healthier behaviors
• Case studies and examples that you will relate to.
• Support and validation from other people on the same boat. In my experience sometimes people feel intimidated at the beginning to share their vulnerabilities and struggles, but after the first or two sessions they realized is the best thing they could have done and wonder why they didn’t do it sooner. Recognizing our areas of growth is a virtue and a sign of strength. Nobody is done growing as a person, is a life journey.
• Overcoming and making sense of our childhoods so we don’t have to repeat what didn’t work for us. Even in the best families things weren’t ideal because our grandparents and parents didn’t have the wealth of information and tools that are available for us today.
• Skills to practice from day one so you can start moving towards a more secure attachment style.
• Latest information and exercises from neurobiology and child development to make sure that your relationship with your kids can thrive and be a source of happiness for both of you.
• Map of what a healthy relationship with your child looks like and the dance of closeness and separation according to their developmental stage.
• Understanding of your child’s temperament and how it works with yours.

Why is this attachment stuff so important?

In case you are wondering why is this attachment stuff so important and what does it have to do with what you are dealing with….After all, you are busy and tired enough, you have enough things in my mind to ad one more.

Let me tell you that by improving your attachment style, you won’t only improve your relationship with you and your children but with people in general, and your overall wellbeing. A secure attachment style for you and your family is the best gift anyone van have. As Diane Pole, PhD. says it is like hitting the jack pot.  It significantly determines health, happiness and capacity for finding balance in life. Why? Because attachment is responsible for:

• shaping the success or failure of future intimate relationships
• the ability to maintain emotional balance
• the ability to enjoy being ourselves and to find satisfaction in being with others
• ability to rebound from disappointment, discouragement, and misfortune.

This group is for you:

• If you believe we can do things better
• If you don’t want to just survive, but thrive
• You want change but you don’t think you can do it alone (neither you should)
• Understand that we are a tricky time. Past parenting focused on rigid rules and was parent centered. But we have to be careful to not go the other extreme. Lets find the balance.
• You are a life long learner
• Want to be the change that you want in the world
• You like being aware and want the best for your children. Who doesn’t! So now you can commit your own work for that?

Format:

• We will meet once every two weeks from the comfort of your home or office via online and work on the items mentioned above. Mobile access also available.
• After registering you will receive an online form to fill out before first session. Please provide your email address.
• The sessions will be recorded for anybody that cannot attend. Commitment is required and cancellations accepted only with 48 hours. Payment is required to receive recording to encourage accountability and reliability for the other members of the group. It is expected that you will listen to it before next meeting. If you can’t attend the sessions live but would like the recordings contact me for special pricing.

Payment:

PS. This format will be more psychoeducational than the one in person but you will still be able to share and ask personal questions and processing depending on your own level of involvement. If you are in the area and/or prefer to attend in person, check here.